accountability

Time to make myself accountable.  Time to start posting.  Time to put what’s going on in my life/brain down on paper (i.e. blog).  Time to focus.  Time to throw myself back into the world of the living.  Time to snap out of it.

I read something the other day on facebook.   -When I was 38 I contemplated beginning a two year Associates Degree… I was talking to a friend and had almost talked myself out of doing it. I said “I’m too old to start that. I’ll be 40 when I get my degree.” My friend said “If you don’t do it, you’ll still be 40, but without the degree.”-

So there you have it.  Same problem, different scenario.  I’m going to be 60 this year.  The statement then is, “If I don’t quit drinking, I’ll still be 60, but not sober.”  Well, you get the idea.

Unless the stats are wrong on this site, it shows that almost 80 people viewed my blog yesterday.  That is crazy.  I haven’t written since October.  It pushed me to want to get my stuff out there.  There are so many of us going through this – truly unbelievable how many alcoholics are out there – I want to help, to share, to get through this, to make a difference for someone in my shoes.

That being said, it was a rough 2015.  I was around 530 days sober and on February 18, 2015, I walked into a liquor store and purchased a bottle of wine.  I can’t tell you why, I have no idea what propelled me in there.  All I remember is that I wanted a drink.  And I did just that.  I think I had a glass or 2 and thought, “yuck.”  A month passed and I had another drink. . . . and the spiral downward began.  I started drinking regularly around May.  It has not only cost me my brain cells and clarity but also my financial stability.  I don’t even want to tell you how much money has been spent on alcohol in only the past 8 months.  It’s unbelievable, really.

So, why today am I getting back on board the sobersphere?  I have to.  That’s it.  Today, if I was counting, is day 3.  My word for the year is STRENGTH and my mantra on the way home from work is NO.

I look forward to engaging with new (or relatively new) sober bloggers out there this time around.  Wish me luck!

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10 Responses to accountability

  1. ainsobriety says:

    Welcome back.
    Thank you for sharing that. It seems hard to imagine that addictive behaviour sucks people back in so easily, but it seems to be true.
    Your experience helps me a lot.
    Day 3 is great. You are back at it.
    Hug

  2. Soberlinda says:

    Hey, welcome back! It’s a journey, not a straight line

  3. TonyToneVega says:

    I know what you have gone through, I was sober for five years straight and on July 4th, 2015, I thought that I was going to be able to drink socially, boy was I wrong. To make a long story short, today is January 28th, 2016 and it is my 4th sober day. Congratulations on staying sober my friend.

  4. Congrats on your day 3! Cool. 🙂 I wish you luck and strength.

  5. UnPickled says:

    Re-embracing sobriety is the best 60th birthday gift you could possibly give yourself (and those you love). Glad you’re back.

  6. Welcome back, Debbie. Hugs, hang tight.
    Sharon

  7. Go you! sobriety at 60 is a wonderful gift. We are never to old to learn new tricks. You CAN do this. I will be here to cheer you on. (I’m a great little cheerleader) And I’m 41 days sober (go me!) plus I will be 61 this year…ughhhh …but I plan on celebrating it sober!

  8. thirstystill says:

    Welcome back to blogging. I sure know the back and forth of quitting and feeling great and then drinking again. I’ve done that a few times, too, and that spiral kicks in pretty darn fast. Recommitting is tough but for me it’s been good to do. Wishing you lots of luck and everything else you need! xo

  9. Welcome back, thanks so much for sharing this, it helps all of us!

  10. Viatoday says:

    Thanks for posting and sharing! Welcome back! You sound motivated!

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