I have decided it’s about time I tackled my newest addiction. Chocolate and sweets (ice cream, candy). When I stopped drinking I found that eating something sweet in the evening after dinner REALLY helped curb the craving for alcohol. And for obvious reasons. I thought nothing of it. I needed to stop drinking and do it the easiest way possible, and chocolate was there for me. Every single night.
Months passed and I thought about how much chocolate I was consuming but decided it best to stick with what was working for now. Doing too many things while trying to remain sober can be detrimental to the process. I shied away from exercising. I tried it, but doing that and not drinking, for me, was a problem. Too much pressure on me to “succeed”. I needed to succeed at one thing at a time and at that time, alcohol was (and is) TOP priority. Same holds true for the chocolate. Several months ago I decided it was time to finally stop eating all the sweet stuff. Holy cow! That was a horrible experiment. Not just avoiding the candy, which was difficult in and of itself, but all I could think about was drinking again. I fought that for about a week, and I couldn’t take it any longer, so I started eating the chocolate again. I returned to ‘normal’.
Here I am at close to 11 months. I am hoping that I can beat the chocolate addiction this time around. I am unsure, but I have to give it a try. Being addicted to ANYTHING sucks. And eating candy at work and then after dinner eating a whole candy bar is JUST NOT GOOD FOR ME. I am an ‘all or nothing’ kind of gal. I can’t just eat a bite or two of something and put it down for another day. Just like drinking. I can’t have a glass of wine or a cocktail and then just stop. That’s just NOT going to happen.
I have been given the OK by my physical therapist and Dr to get moving again. So I am going to get my ass off the couch and try to get back in the routine of exercising (jogging) again and eating correctly. This is going to be rough. Very rough. Summer is half gone, if I don’t get moving now, I’ll create too many excuses once the weather begins to get foul.
Argh. . . .