180 days

Today is Sunday. Tomorrow (or is it Tuesday?) I hit my 180 mark. I met the 180 day challenge! Getting to 180 was easier than getting to 100, no doubt! But I have to say that days 101 to about 140 had their moments of true difficulty. Each of us has their own way of dealing with this. I’ve noticed that some who post say they have thoughts of drinking but it’s not a craving or urge (at this stage in their sobriety). To them, it’s more like a thought and it’s gone. Me, mine’s more like a need. I have to talk myself down for a few minutes. Going through the debate. Fortunately, it does go away quickly (well, quickER than it did) and it is getting less and less.

I know my day 1 was THE day that I began down this road to sobriety, but I still feel very vulnerable like I could still go either way. I am at 6 months now but it doesn’t feel like much at all. I think I will feel much better when I hit the one year mark in September. At that point I (hope I) will feel like I am truly on the right path as far as my sobriety goes. I want to be okay with being sober and know that it was the right choice. Not there yet. I feel like day 1 of living my real life is still ahead of me.

Peace

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10 Responses to 180 days

  1. Pippin says:

    Congratulations!

  2. Jean says:

    Debbie,
    Congratulations on day 180, it is a huge accomplishment. Think of all the drinks you didn’t have, all the hangovers you didn’t have, all the mornings you have woken up feeling great. I am 6 weeks behind you and appreciate how you share your cravings and your highs and lows, it makes me feel that even though I love not drinking, it is a struggle.
    Jean

    • Debbie says:

      Thanks, Jean. Always one of my strongest supporters! Couldn’t do it without reading all the blogs and comments – daily! Your 6 months is right around the corner 🙂

  3. Lilly says:

    Hooray!!!! Oh my goodness, look how far you’ve come. That is so totally awesome. I hope you have a huge 180/6 month sober treat planned? I really think six month is a huge turning point. At least, it felt like it for me, so i’m not sure why I then drank again but I wish I’d kept going. So keep going! 🙂 You sound so strong and good right now. xx

    • Debbie says:

      I can’t believe I’ve made it this far. Some days I wonder if I can even make it to the next. No treats planned. It just seems so uneventful at this stage since I’m still not “there” yet. Thanks for your support. I’m rooting for you my friend! Stay strong 🙂

  4. Billie says:

    Thanks for writing this, it really chimes with me. I am at Day 76, and the achievement feels miraculous, unreal and, as you suggest, terribly fragile. Good luck with the next 6 months. x

    • Debbie says:

      Congratulations on 76 days! It is miraculous and all because of you and your desire to stay sober 🙂 Those first couple months are killer and you are now past that. Keep it up!

  5. Miss Soul says:

    Congratulations !!

  6. momma bee says:

    Congrats, 180 days is a huge deal~ thank you for sharing. treat yourself to something extra special this week. I felt a lot like you, ex: ” I want to be okay with being sober and know that it was the right choice”. I was at 101 sober days and I wish I never picked up that first drink on Feb 1 even thou I pledged 180 days. Today I again pledged 100 days and starting at day 1. Thank you for sharing your journey and I look forward to your next 6 months of sobriety. Hugs. MB

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