Some of you know that I started eating healthier and exercising as of Feb 1. My diet consisted of mostly Paleo type foods. Lots of meat and vegetables with some fruit. I am doing without processed foods (anything white) and sugars (not found in fruits).
After 10 days of being on this “diet,” I discovered that it is just TOO soon for me to try ‘new’ things. The last 3 days have been just THE WORST in regard to Ms Crazy being in my head almost demanding that I go get drunk. Not just have 1 glass of wine or whatever but really go out and drink. It’s been very, very tempting to go do just that. I’m afraid that changing my diet has screwed with something in my body chemistry. Could it have been that I went “cold turkey” on NO chocolate or anything sweet? I’m thinking, “yes.” My body wanted something sweet and if I wasn’t going to allow myself sweets then I was going to drink.
Very scary. I’m almost to 5 months and would really hate to blow it now. So, I scaled back the diet from 100% no bad foods to 60-65% no bad foods. Or somewhere in that range.
What sucks is that it can still happen. I could still go down. The chatter volume goes up and the volume goes down. I wish it would just go away. Maybe I give it too much attention? Too much “weight” in my thoughts? Maybe I’m still feeding it when I should just let it go? Best I get a new mind set and STARVE THE BASTARD.