lots of thoughts

Good morning to everyone out there in our little sobersphere. I am pushing through day 8 today. My “umpteenth” day 8 (as my dad would say). I just read a post where someone is back on day 1. It pulls at my heart strings being that I was just there 8 days ago. It’s such a love/hate relationship with that day. Love that you are getting your shit together and putting yourself back on track and hate that it’s day 1 again cuz that just SUCKS. You can hear it in the words people write. Be strong ThisReclamation. We are all behind you and believe in you.

Last night I went on my house hunt again. We did 4 houses with many miles between each so we were out for about 1.5 hours. It was 7:30pm when we looked at the last house. It was it. THE HOUSE. I walked in and knew right away. I looked at my realtor and said, “Let’s make the offer right now.” The listing agent was in the garage, so we went out and asked if there were any other offers out there. She said yes and it was solid. Then why THE HELL was it still on the market and showing as an active listing? AND getting my hopes up like that Argh. So disappointed.

I was bummed, I was hungry, it was late (as far as getting home and fixing dinner). The thought of stopping for a drink crossed my mind for .001 seconds. I was so close to my house that I just drove straight home, threw a dinner in the microwave and 4 minutes later had dinner with my grandkids. Well, we were on the floor trying to work on some string project, so I ate and assisted as needed. Thought again about how nice it would be to have a glass of wine right then, but it was too late for that.

Still having some trouble with the sleep thing – both falling asleep and staying asleep – but know that soon I will be back on track. Must remain focused!!

It’s a beautiful fall day 🙂

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